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Jokes, funny lines, hilarious skits



   Randomly-Ordered Tracks

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YOU NEVER SEE A PICTURE OF MARGARET TATCHER SHOPP - (by Ultimate Sound)
Ultimate Sound Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Edit Type: Full Track - Comedy,  
8250 0:05   


THE PRESIDENT IS NOT IN... - (by Ultimate Sound)
Ultimate Sound Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Edit Type: Full Track - Comedy,  
24933 0:07   


... PHONE CALL FOR AL, AL CHOLIC. IS THERE AN AL - (by Ultimate Sound)
Ultimate Sound Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Edit Type: Full Track - Comedy,  
23238 0:25   


OLD MEN TALK ABOUT SEX - (by Ultimate Sound)
Ultimate Sound Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Edit Type: Full Track - Comedy,  
11584 0:08   


I'M NOT WEARING ANY PANTS...FILM AT 11 - (by Ultimate Sound)
Ultimate Sound Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Edit Type: Full Track - Comedy,  
13004 0:03   


JOKE ABOUT VAMPIRES - (by Hollywood Post)
Hollywood Post Bad vampire joke, Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Edit Type: Full Track - Comedy,  
206066 0:32   


FRESH FROM AMERICA'S DAIRYLAND, THE MAN-EATING COW - (by Ultimate Sound)
Ultimate Sound Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Edit Type: Full Track - Comedy,  
17490 0:06   


... I WAS JUST TRYING TO ISOLATE THE WORDS THAT AR - (by Ultimate Sound)
Ultimate Sound Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Edit Type: Full Track - Comedy,  
16852 0:27   


HOW DO YOU MAKE A DOG....BANDSAW - (by Ultimate Sound)
Ultimate Sound Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Edit Type: Full Track - Comedy,  
5845 0:06   


MY PARENTS USED TO BEAT THE LIVING SHIT....KIDS... - (by Ultimate Sound)
Ultimate Sound Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Edit Type: Full Track - Comedy,  
6499 0:27   


ARE YOU A PSYCHOPATHIC WACKO? - (by Ultimate Sound)
Ultimate Sound Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Edit Type: Full Track - Comedy,  
13385 1:05   


JEFF FOX: IF SOMEONE ASKED TO SEE YOUR ID AND YOU - (by Ultimate Sound)
Ultimate Sound Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Edit Type: Full Track - Comedy,  
25244 0:07   


I LOVE YOU MORE THAN FOOD - (by Pete Bax)
Pete Bax I Love you more than Food comedy monologue ringtone, Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Edit Type: Full Track - Comedy,
333005 0:47   


7 DWARFS - (by Ultimate Sound)
Ultimate Sound Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Edit Type: Full Track - Comedy,  
7360 0:07   


RUN FOR YOUR LIFE, IT IS A POSTAL WORKER - (by Ultimate Sound)
Ultimate Sound Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Edit Type: Full Track - Comedy,  
13292 0:07   


MIRROR MIRROR - (by Pete Bax)
Pete Bax Mirror Mirror comedy monologue, Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Edit Type: Full Track - Comedy,
333012 0:58   


EVERYONE'S GONE ... DISEASE - (by Ultimate Sound)
Ultimate Sound Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Edit Type: Full Track - Comedy,  
27885 0:12   


POTTY EMERGENCY - (by Ultimate Sound)
Ultimate Sound Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Edit Type: Full Track - Comedy,  
4559 0:02   


FEMALE: HELLO, OPERATOR, CAN YOU GIVE ME THAT 911 - (by Ultimate Sound)
Ultimate Sound Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Edit Type: Full Track - Comedy,  
7377 0:07   


JEFF FOX: IF GOING TO THE BATHROOM IN THE MIDDLE - (by Ultimate Sound)
Ultimate Sound Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Edit Type: Full Track - Comedy,  
25240 0:09   


LECHEROUS BOB SHOOTS JAMES BROWN - (by Ultimate Sound)
Ultimate Sound Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Edit Type: Full Track - Comedy,  
20649 0:12   


MALE: HEY, HOW THE HELL ARE YOU? WELCOME TO JACK - (by Ultimate Sound)
Ultimate Sound Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Edit Type: Full Track - Comedy,  
10731 1:15   


YOU MEN ARE ALL ALIKE - (by John M. Peters)
John M. Peters Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Edit Type: Full Track - Comedy,  
338418 0:30   


JEFF FOX: IF DIRECTIONS TO YOUR HOUSE, INCLUDE TUR - (by Ultimate Sound)
Ultimate Sound Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Edit Type: Full Track - Comedy,  
25238 0:07   


ADVERTISEMENT FOR ELVIS TAPES--PARODY - (by Ultimate Sound)
Ultimate Sound Elvis impersonator ad for tapes, Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Edit Type: Full Track - Comedy,  
2925 1:24   


GET YOUR BUTTS OUT OF THE ATTIC ... - (by Ultimate Sound)
Ultimate Sound Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Edit Type: Full Track - Comedy,  
12932 0:13   


DUBTHEATER COMMERCIAL - (by Ultimate Sound)
Ultimate Sound Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Edit Type: Full Track - Comedy,  
2915 1:22   


AYAAYAYA RIGHTY THEN ! - (by Ultimate Sound)
Ultimate Sound Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Edit Type: Full Track - Comedy,  
5435 0:06   


I SAY WE GO DOWN TO THE SCUMMY SIDE OF TOWN AND GI - (by Ultimate Sound)
Ultimate Sound Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Edit Type: Full Track - Comedy,  
25787 0:04   


LIFE IS LIKE A MOP - (by Ultimate Sound)
Ultimate Sound Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Edit Type: Full Track - Comedy,  
11504 0:57   


IT'S BEEN FUN 1 - VOICE JAMES - BRITISH MALE - (by Blazznet Talking Box)
Blazznet Talking Box This has been an enjoyable day. We have enjoyed ourselves, let's do it again sometime. Till next time. Deep and present voice, queen's English accent, professionally recorded with no ambiance to suit any of your production requirements. Talking, British / Male
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Edit Type: Full Track (version 1) - Talking, British / Male
687756 0:01   
Edit Type: Full Track (version 2) - DJ Sounds, DJ Humor
687757 0:02   
Edit Type: Variation A (slower) - DJ Sounds, DJ Outros
687758 0:02   
Edit Type: Variation B (slower 2) - DJ Sounds, DJ Vocal stingers
687760 0:02   
Edit Type: Variation C (slower n lower) - Comedy,
687761 0:02   


LECHEROUS BOB SNEEZING - (by Ultimate Sound)
Ultimate Sound Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Edit Type: Full Track - Comedy,  
20659 0:02   


ALWAYS REMEMBER THESE WORDS....SCREW 'EM - (by Ultimate Sound)
Ultimate Sound Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Edit Type: Full Track - Comedy,  
5483 0:04   


AND NOW THE FINAL ORDEAL ... - (by Ultimate Sound)
Ultimate Sound Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Edit Type: Full Track - Comedy,  
13388 0:05   


THAT THING NEEDS MORE POWER THAT'S ALL IT NEEDS. - (by Ultimate Sound)
Ultimate Sound Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Edit Type: Full Track - Comedy,  
25583 0:02   


KID STUFF - 01 - (by John M. Peters)
John M. Peters Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Edit Type: Full Track - Comedy,  
338413 0:30   


JEFF FOX: IF YOU'VE EVER BEEN TOO DRUNK TO FISH, - (by Ultimate Sound)
Ultimate Sound Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Edit Type: Full Track - Comedy,  
25243 0:06   


JEFF FOX: IF YOUR TWO YEAR OLD HAS MORE TEETH THA - (by Ultimate Sound)
Ultimate Sound Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Edit Type: Full Track - Comedy,  
25235 0:07   


DON'T MIND THE DOG..RUB IT ALL OVER - (by AJ Pro Audio)
AJ Pro Audio Posh demented woman's voice "Don't mind the dog..Rub it all over", Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Edit Type: Full Track - Comedy,
359002 0:03   


MY GLASSES! I CAN'T SEE WITHOUT MY GLASSES. MY G - (by Ultimate Sound)
Ultimate Sound Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Edit Type: Full Track - Comedy,  
28283 0:07   


YOU GO GIRL - (by Ultimate Sound)
Ultimate Sound Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Edit Type: Full Track - Comedy,  
24891 0:02   


POLICE SQUAD COMEDY SKIT - (by Ultimate Sound)
Ultimate Sound Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Edit Type: Full Track - Comedy,  
21345 1:29   


SINGLE. S I N G L E. STAY INTOXICATED NIGHTLY, G - (by Ultimate Sound)
Ultimate Sound Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Edit Type: Full Track - Comedy,  
26190 0:07   


I'M LOOKING FOR A CUTE LITTLE... - (by Ultimate Sound)
Ultimate Sound Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Edit Type: Full Track - Comedy,  
8225 0:04   


GUNSHOT - MA, PA SHOT AT AOL AGAIN - (by Ultimate Sound)
Ultimate Sound Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Edit Type: Full Track - Comedy,  
4654 0:10   


MALE - THE STRAIN WAS TERRIFIC...IMPOSSIBLE...GOT - (by Ultimate Sound)
Ultimate Sound Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Edit Type: Full Track - Comedy,  
5484 0:07   


HELLO....ALICE COOPER...LOVE TO GET BACK AT YOU - (by Ultimate Sound)
Ultimate Sound Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Edit Type: Full Track - Comedy,  
2867 0:09   


WEIRD AL YANKOVIC AT HOME WITH MOM - (by Hollywood Post)
Hollywood Post Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Edit Type: Full Track - Comedy,  
48062 0:21   


SO, ARE YOU CHINESE OR JAPANESE? - (by Ultimate Sound)
Ultimate Sound Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Edit Type: Full Track - Comedy,  
11237 0:35   


GOIN TO HELL... - (by Ultimate Sound)
Ultimate Sound Comedy,
Type Play Track Info Catalog ID Min:Sec Tempo & BPM Price Control
Edit Type: Full Track - Comedy,  
30663 0:03   



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Jokes, funny lines, skits